T-Swift and What to Do When You’re Not 22

For almost a year, I have been the age twenty-two. The age twenty-two is the only age that you can guiltlessly sing the song “22” by Taylor Swift (If you haven’t heard of it, for Heaven’s sake click here.). “22” is the song that many a person, gladly or not, ends up singing on their twenty-second birthday. Sometimes, it might just be the case that a friend sings it to you against your will. With my twenty-third birthday fast approaching, I came to the realization that I would no longer be able to sing the song “22” by Taylor Swift without lying. And this was grave news indeed.

This news prompted me to create alternatives for those unfortunate enough to be in the awkward situation where they must either choose to lie whilst accurately singing the lyrics or be that person in the corner who chooses to not sing at all. Below, I have listed some alternatives for those in their 20s (except age 20). I also added a few alternatives to the original lyrics for the age twenty-two just for funsies. As it would have taken a ridiculous amount of time to create alternatives for every age out there, I chose just to write these, though I encourage you to create your own lyrics as needed. I’d like to encourage a world where singing is done most honestly while we can still sing along with the hits of our day. Without further ado…

Original lyrics:

“I don’t know about you, but I’m feelin’ twenty-two. Everything will be alright if you keep me next to you.”

Alternative lyrics:

21

• ·         My bar-less days are done, and I’m feelin’ twenty-one. Everything will be alright just don’t go tell all the nuns.
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• ·         Let’s party in the sun, cause I’m feelin’ twenty-one. Everything will be alright if we just keep having fun.
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• ·         I haven’t lived a ton, but I’m feelin’ twenty-one. Everything will be alright ‘cause my life has just begun.

22

• ·         I lost my only shoes, but I’m feelin’ twenty-two. Everything will be alright, even if I step in poo.
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• ·         My grade is totally screwed, but I’m feeling twenty-two. Everything would be alright if my paper wasn’t due.
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• ·         I don’t know how you knew, but I’m feeling twenty-two. Everything will be alright though I didn’t have a clue.
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• ·         My birthday ain’t through, and I’m feelin’ twenty-two. Everything will be alright ‘cause the sky outside is blue.

23

• ·         I don’t know about ye, but I’m feelin’ twenty-three. Everything will be alright if you keep me next to thee.
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• ·         You don’t know about me, but I’m feelin’ twenty-three. Everything will be alright though I’m lonely as can be.
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• ·         There’s a lot to see, but I’m feelin' twenty-three. Everything would be alright if traveling were only free.
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• ·         Paid my admission fee, but I’m feelin’ twenty-three. Everything will be alright when, I’m done with university.
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• ·         I hereby decree, that I’m feelin’ twenty-three. Everything will be alright ‘cause, you fill my life with glee.

24

• ·         My birthday’s a bore, but I’m feeling twenty-four. Everything will be alright once my friends come through the door.
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• ·         I don’t know what’s in store, but I’m feelin’ twenty-four. Everything will be alright, though I’m really, really poor.
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• ·         I won the game once more, but I’m feelin’ twenty-four. Everything will be alright if I’m the one keeping score.
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• ·         I might’ve lost my oar, but I’m feelin’ twenty-four. Everything will be alright if the waves bring me to shore.

25

• ·         All my friends have arrived, and I’m feelin’ twenty-five. Everything will be alright cause it’s great to be alive.
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• ·         Parties and I don’t jive, but I’m feelin’ twenty-five. Everything will be alright if, my friends don’t all connive.
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• ·         In life I’m forced to dive, but I’m feelin’ twenty-five. Everything will be alright, ya, guess that’s what I’ve derived.

26

• ·         I got boxed cake mix, but I’m feelin’ twenty six. Everything will be alright, though, it turned out like a brick.
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• ·         I’m with my group of chicks, and I’m feelin’ twenty-six. Everything will be alright if, we just avoid those dicks.
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• ·         I got a car to fix, and I’m feelin’ twenty-six. Everything will be alright if, I make some friends with hicks.
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• ·         They take too many pics, but I’m feelin’ twenty-six. Everything will be alright when they stop the snaps and clicks.
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• ·         I got a date with Vicks, but I’m feeling twenty-six. Everything will be alright, though. I’ll just watch some Netflix.

27

• ·         I know my life ain’t Heaven, but I’m feelin’ twenty-seven. Everything will be alright ‘cause bad stuff grows me like leaven.

28

• ·         I don’t know my fate, but I’m feelin’ twenty-eight. Everything will be alright if, we all just ditch the hate.
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• ·         I don’t have a mate, but I’m feelin’ twenty-eight. Everything would be alright if, I could just find a date.
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• ·         I got cake on my plate, but I’m feelin’ twenty-eight. Everything will be alright if this don’t affect my weight.
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• ·         Don’t got time to berate, while I’m feelin’ twenty-eight. Everything will be alright cause, my life is going great.
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• ·         I don’t like to wait, while I’m feelin’ twenty-eight. Everything would be alright but, your gift to me was late.

29

• ·         I got tingles in my spine, and I’m feelin’ twenty-nine. Everything will be alright, guys. This is our time to shine.
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• ·         I don’t wanna whine, but I’m feelin’ twenty-nine. Everything will be alright while my hands are held in thine.
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• ·         I don’t like this line, but I’m feelin’ twenty-nine. Everything will be alright if you bring me a glass of wine.
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• ·         You know I’m lookin’ fine, but I’m feelin’ twenty-nine. Everything will be alright if, you keep your hand in mine.

There. Now weren’t those great? I know. Maybe even better than the original. We love you, Taylor!